Of Course OJ Did It

(153 reasons why)

excerpted from Spy Magazine's

1001 Reasons why the OJ Trial is the most Absurd Event in the History of America

  1. He's Guilty!

    Here's Why:

    His Own Words

  2. A prison guard who watched OJ talking to minister Rosey Grier behind a non-soundproof-glass partition signed an affidavit swearing that he heard OJ shout, "I did it!"
  3. Juditha Brown overheard OJ moaning "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," over Nicole's casket
  4. Police allegedly recorded the cellular calls OJ made from his Bronco using a scanner. In one-segment - after OJ's mother told him he could plead temporary insanity - rather than deny he killed her, OJ said "It was all her fault, Mom."
  5. OJ once told Nicole, "If I can't have you, no one else can."
  6. Prosecutor Christopher Darden claims OJ turned to Ron Fishman the night of the murders and said of Nicole: "I'm going to get her, I'm going to teach her a lesson."
  7. According to Nicole's housekeeper, Elvia, OJ said to Nicole, "Someday, bitch, I'm going to kill you."

    His Lawyer's Words

  8. Shortly after the murders, Alan Dershowitz Told an interviewer that OJ might consider pleading insanity.

    The Evidence:

  9. Ron Goldman's boots were covered with blood, which DNA testing revealed to be a mixture of his and OJ's.
  10. OJ's blood matches five drops on the walkway outside Nicole's condo leading away from the crime scene.
  11. Blood samples found in the Bronco match Ron and Nicole's and OJ's.
  12. Drops of OJ's blood were found in a trail leading up his driveway and into his foyer.
  13. The blood on a sock in OJ's bedroom matched both OJ and Nicole
  14. Blood was found in shower and sink of OJ's bathroom.
  15. More than a dozen DNA tests link OJ to the crime scene.
  16. Fibers found on the knit cap left at the crime scene and the bloody glove behind OJ's house were unique to the 1993 and 1994 Ford Bronco. OJ's was a 1994.
  17. Hairs in the cap "exhibit the same microscopic characteristics" as those contained in a reference sample taken from OJ's head.
  18. The large number of hairs inside the cap suggest that OJ had worn it.
  19. A hair closely resembling OJ's was found on Goldman's shirt.
  20. A 12-inch hair with the same characteristics as those of Nicole Simpson was found on the bloody glove discovered at OJ's estate.
  21. Similar dark bluish-brown fibers theorized to have come from the killer's clothing were found on Goldman's shirt, OJ's socks, and the bloody glove.
  22. Kato testified that OJ was wearing a dark sweatsuit just a few hours before the murders.
  23. Prints left at the murder scene were created by someone wearing expensive, size 12, Bruno Magli shoes.
  24. OJ wears size 12 shoes.

    Why the Blood Evidence Was Not Tampered With:

  25. Splatter on OJ's socks showed more than two dozen blood drops.
  26. None of the splatters soaked through from one side of the socks to the other, suggesting that they were being worn when the blood hit them.
  27. The drops containing Nicole's blood were found around the ankle areas, suggesting it was splashed on the socks at the crime scene.
  28. The stains containing OJ's blood were found higher on the leg and on the toe of one sock, suggesting he stained one sock when he returned home and pulled them off.
  29. The stains also included a number of microscopically small flakes and spots too tiny to have been produced by tampering.
  30. Witnesses testified they had not originally noticed the stains - not because they weren't there until the LAPD planted them - but more likely because the socks are black and it is nearly impossible to see the stains with the naked eye.
  31. Some DNA samples from the crime scene, glove, socks, and OJ's estate were degraded while others were easily typed, suggesting they had been subjected to different degrees of exposure to the elements.
  32. If the drops had been tampered with in the lab, they would have degraded at the same rate.
  33. The blood was not just examined by the LAPD, but also by the Cellmark Diagnostics laboratory in Maryland and the California Department of Justice. They all came to the same conclusions.
  34. Criminalist Henry Lee stated that investigators erred by putting Goldman's boot into a bag while it was still wet, allowing the blood to smear.
  35. He did not explain how OJ's blood landed on Goldman's boot.
  36. An Aris Isotoner exec testified that the gloves at the crime scene are identical to those OJ is wearing in a 1991 photo.
  37. There were only 200-240 of the gloves sold - all of them at a Bloomingdale's in New York City.
  38. Bloomindale's records show that Nicole purchased two pairs of gloves in December 1990 - as a Christmas present for OJ.
  39. A DNA test confirmed that blood found in OJ's Bronco came from Goldman, whom OJ says he never met.
  40. Kato testified that he saw blood in the foyer and driveway of OJ's house the morning after the murders.
  41. Even if blood samples degenerate, they do not change DNA characteristics.

    The Motive

  42. Police uncovered a taped 911 call Nicole made days before the murder to report a prowler spying on her and Ron Goldman. Goldman's voice can be heard in the background describing the prowler and his movements: "It's a black guy, dressed all in black...I can see him moving around outside. Oh, there he goes, around the corner."
  43. Hours before her death Nicole told OJ: "I don't love you anymore and I don't need you anymore."
  44. Kato testified that on the afternoon of the murders, OJ talked about he and Nicole: "[T]he relationship was over. They were not together any more."

    "Domestic Discord"

  45. A week before the murders, Nicole told Cici Shahian, Robert Kardashian's cousin: "He's going to kill me and get away with it, and charm the world, because he's OJ Simpson."
  46. She told two other friends, Faye Resnick and Robin Greer that OJ was going to kill her.
  47. She told therapist Susan Forward that she was afraid OJ would kill her.
  48. 1977: Neighbors hear OJ beating Nicole and later see her with black eyes.
  49. 1982: OJ smashes framed photos of Nicole and her family, throws Nicole against a wall, and throws her and her clothes out of the house.
  50. 1987: OJ hits Nicole and throws her to the ground.
  51. 1989: OJ slaps Nicole and pushes her out of a slow-moving car.
  52. A week before the murders, Nicole called a battered women's shelter for help because she claimed OJ was stalking her.
  53. Nicole wrote in her diary that OJ used to lock her in their wine cellar overnight when he was angry with her, and periodically would come in to beat her.
  54. She wrote that she was afraid he would kill her.
  55. She wrote that OJ had beaten her while they made love.
  56. She called police 30 times after the beatings.
  57. In her divorce papers Nicole wrote of one incident in which OJ began beating her on a New York street corner and continued to beat her all the way back to and inside their hotel room: "He continued to beat me as I kept crawling for the door."
  58. 1988 OJ beat Nicole after she let a gay man kiss their son.
  59. While driving, Nicole told her mother, "I'm scared. I go to the gas station, he's there. I'm driving, and he's behind me."
  60. Nicole made out her will five weeks before she was murdered.

    The 1989 Incident:

  61. Police respond to a 911 call to find a bruised, bleeding Nicole hiding in the bushes wearing only a bra and sweatpants.
  62. "He's going to kill me!" Nicole sobbed repeatedly.
  63. OJ came out of the house yelling, "I got two other women and I don't want that woman in my bed anymore."
  64. When told he would be arrested, OJ yelled, "The police have been out here eight times before, and now you're going to arrest me for this?"
  65. OJ pleaded no contest to spousal battery and was convicted of the crime
  66. OJ later said of the beating: "No one was hurt, it was no big deal."
  67. He also said, "At times, I have felt like a battered husband."
  68. Nicole had her sister Denise take pictures of her bruised body and locked them in a safe deposit box.
  69. She told Denise, "I need proof that OJ beat me. Without proof no one will ever believe me. The public thinks he's a hero who can do no wrong."

    Nicole's 1993 911 Call:

  70. OJ can be heard screaming and cursing in the background.
  71. Dispatcher: "Is he threatening you?" Nicole: "He's going fucking nuts!"
  72. "Stay on the line." "...He's gonna beat the shit out of me."
  73. "Has this happened before?" "Many times."
  74. In the background OJ can be heard screaming about Keith Zlomsowitch, the man OJ saw Nicole give a blow job to.
  75. Nicole to police: "When he gets this crazed, I get scared...He gets a very animalistic look in him...His eyes are black, just black, I mean cold, like an animal."

    The Bronco Chase:

    Jennifer Peace, porn star and Al Cowling's lover, told the grand jury that Cowlings had told her:
  76. the chase was actually an attempt to flee to Mexico.
  77. the crime scene gloves were OJ's
  78. A.C. had helped dispose of the weapon
  79. The defense claims that, during the chase, OJ was on his way to commit suicide at Nicole's grave, yet A.C. drove past the cemetery entrance.
  80. They were driving in the direction of Mexico.
  81. Shapiro claimed on camera that OJ couldn't have been fleeing for Mexico because "he only had $60 on him." It turned out he had $8,000.
  82. Police also found OJ's passport and a fake moustache and beard in the Bronco.
  83. Shapiro claimed the moustache and beard was because OJ was planning to take his kids to Disneyland - incognito.
  84. Photos taken before the murders show OJ at Disneyland with his two kids, sans fake moustache and beard.
  85. During a Bronco call, OJ tried to shoot himself, but the gun jammed.
  86. The grand jury investigation into A.C. found that: "After [Nicole's] funeral, Cowlings and Simpson exchanged clothing. Cowlings practiced walking like Simpson. Cowlings covered his head with his jacket, entered Simpson's limousine and returned to Simpson's residence in Brentwood. This ruse caused the media and the police to believe that Simpson had returned to his Brentwood home."
  87. Instead, OJ, aided by an off-duty LAPD sergeant, slipped off to Robert Kardashian's house, where Cowlings met up with him the next day.
  88. The two fled moments before police arrived to take OJ into custody.

    Why His Alibi Doesn't Cut it:

  89. OJ told police he had no recollection of cutting himself in recent days.
  90. Limo driver Alan Parker testified that OJ told him he was taking a nap when he picked him up, yet Cochran claimed OJ was in his yard hitting golf balls when the murders took place.
  91. The defense later said OJ made a call from his Bronco, then hit golf balls.
  92. The story was changed to explain why OJ called Paula Barbieri from a cel phone rather than use the house phone.
  93. Prosecutors contend the most likely setting for the call was from his Bronco.
  94. Parker testified that at 10:57 p.m. he saw a 6-foot, 200-pound black man walk across OJ's lawn and enter the front door.
  95. Right after that, the lights went on.
  96. Moments later, OJ answered the phone and said he'd been asleep and would be right down.
  97. Perjurer Rosa Lopez said that OJ's car had not moved from its spot outside his house all evening.
  98. But Parker said he did not see the car when he arrived at 10:22 p.m.
  99. Nor had neighbor Charles Cale seen the car when he was walking his dog an hour earlier.
  100. Cale told the jury he was "very certain" that the car wasn't there.

    Why Fuhrman Couldn't Have Planted the Glove:

  101. Police concluded it would have been all but impossible for Fuhrman to have taken a glove from the crime scene and plant it at OJ's house.
  102. According to testimony by Robert Riske, the first officer at the crime scene, police had noticed all of the evidence before Fuhrman had arrived.
  103. All of the evidence samples had been collected and logged before OJ ever gave police his blood sample.
  104. Fourteen officers arrived at the crime scene long before Fuhrman and saw no glove for him to abscond with.
  105. Fuhrman was never out of sight of other officers.
  106. Video footage showed that Fuhrman was not wearing his jacket during the investigation, making it impossible to conceal a bloody glove.
  107. Kato Kaelin reported hearing three loud thumps on his wall near where the glove was found, thumps that he heard before police knew of the murders.
  108. Fuhrman had no way of knowing whether Simpson would have an alibi for the time when the murders occurred.
  109. Fuhrman did not even know whether eyewitnesses might emerge to say they saw the crimes committed.
  110. Fibers on the glove were later found to be consistent with those from the inside of OJ's car, a fact that Fuhrman could not have predicted when he reported finding the glove.

    Why the Theory that the Entire LAPD Was Out to Get OJ is Bullshit:

  111. OJ's book has a photograph of his son Jason wearing OJ's LAPD baseball cap, given to him by the force.
  112. Ron Shipp, a former LAPD officer, often played tennis at OJ's estate.
  113. Against policy, he introduced 40 autograph-hungry cops to the star.
  114. One of the security guards helping then-murder suspect OJ elude photographers at Nicole's funeral was Sgt. Dennis Sebenik, an off-duty LAPD Officer.
  115. Although OJ was the sole suspect at the time, LAPD officials agreed to let him turn himself in after the murders.
  116. The gun that OJ held to his head during the Bronco chase was registered to Earl C. Paysinger, a respected LAPD cop.
  117. He had bought the gun for OJ for his own security prior to the murders.
  118. After the 1989 incident, Det. John Edwards allowed OJ to go back inside his home, unaccompanied, to get dressed before being taken into custody.
  119. Instead, OJ jumped into his Bentley and fled the scene.
  120. Prior to 1989, police responded to Nicole's calls at least seven times, yet OJ was not arrested and no report was taken.
  121. Black Police chief Willie Williams: "The idea that you could get detectives from several different units, police officers, civilian technicians... and who knows what else together and contrive a plot and keep it secret is unbelievable... It's too fanciful to imagine. It's something that belongs in Disneyland."

    Icing on the Case:

  122. OJ had pressured Nicole to get breast implants, then worried that other men would look at her breasts. Her body was found with her breasts slashed.
  123. Six days before the murders, Nicole discovered that a spare set of keys to her condo - including the security gate from the street was missing.
  124. On the flight to Chicago, OJ got up to use the bathroom every 15 minutes.
  125. Forensic expert Henry Lee, who disputed many of the prosecution's blood evidence was at Kardashian's house with OJ and A.C. the night before they made their escape.
  126. The two women lawyers brought in to coach OJ during mock trial sessions told the Dream Team that OJ would be no match for Clark on the stand.
  127. On the day of the murders, OJ phoned Playmate Traci Adell, whom he had never met, and told her about the end of his relationship with Nicole: "I've had enough. I've lived my life."
  128. Adell said, "I think he knew that he would lose it if he didn't stop soon."
  129. The night of the murders, OJ left a message for Gretchen Stockdale, a former L.A. Raiders cheerleader: "Hey, Gretchen, sweetheart, it's Orenthal James, who is finally at a place in his life where he is, like, totally, totally unattached with everybody. Hah! Haah!"
  130. Four days before the murders, OJ rented a pay-per-view porn film called The Genesis Chamber, in which a blonde woman is raped at knifepoint.
  131. Less than two weeks before the murders, Navy SEALs taught OJ the "Silent Kill" knife attack technique for his TV pilot Frogman.
  132. In the weeks before the murders, OJ still referred to Nicole as "my wife."
  133. An LA drug dealer cam forward and testified under polygraph that he had sold OJ and Kato $100 worth of crystal meth - a drug with notoriously violent side effects - shortly before the murders occurred, which they snorted in OJ's Bentley in a Burger King parking lot.
  134. At first, Kato refused to tell his friends what he knew, saying, "It's too big."
  135. When OJ visited the crime scene to identify Nicole's body, officers reported he was cool and calm.
  136. OJ never asked the police how, where, or when Nicole had been killed when they called him.
  137. At the funeral, Nicole's mother asked if OJ had anything to do with the murders. He responded "Oh! Oh! Oh! Judi, I loved her. I loved her too much."
  138. As she lay in the casket, OJ pulled up Nicole's dress and pulled down her collar to look at the wounds.
  139. As the casket was lowered into the ground, a woman next to OJ moaned. OJ whispered to her, "Shit happens."
  140. Another woman alleges that OJ was trying to hit on her at the funeral.
  141. The defense contends there was a massive struggle, but Nicole's children slept through the murders.
  142. OJ on giving the police a fake name when arrested as a youth: "I was really putting one over, a teenage black kid fooling the Establishment."
  143. Kardashian picked OJ up at the airport and drove him home the day after the murders.
  144. Several pieces of OJ's luggage ended up at Kardashian's home.
  145. Later they re-emerged, empty, inside OJ's closet.
  146. Kardashian was not an active-status lawyer at the time of the murders, but he paid the fees to reinstate his active status.
  147. By activating his status and becoming a member of the Dream Team, Kardashian sought to dodge testifying on the grounds of attorney-client privilege.
  148. OJ took his golf clubs to Chicago, left them in the trunk of a Hertz employee's car, then requested the clubs be flown to LA immediately.
  149. Rather than send someone to get the clubs, he and Kardashian went to the airport to retrieve them.
  150. If the knife had been in the golf bag, it wouldn't have set off the airport metal detector.
  151. When police tried to get documents regarding OJ's wife-beating from his office, he was blocked by one of the defense and court-appointed master who was supervising the search of the office.
  152. When the officer returned three weeks later, OJ's personal assistant, Cathy Randa, had shredded them.
  153. Robert Shapiro claimed they were merely "pamphlets" and "brochures".